Performing For People Who Don't Want Me To Perform For Them

Enough said.

This past weekend I did a belly dance for a gentleman's 80th birthday. The woman who hired me, his daughter, seemed confident that this would be a great surprise for him. It is almost always the woman who hires the dancer: the wife, the girlfriend, the mother (yeah, it creeps me out a little when a mother hires me to dance for her son, but who am I to judge), or the daughter.

The hiring woman did call me back a couple of days before the event, just to inquire about details. It seems some of the people involved at this small gathering of family and friends had concerns about what exactly I do, and how I do it (she asked me about "audience participation", did I touch anyone or try to force anyone to do anything?). I reinforced the idea that I am ALWAYS family friendly and appropriate (as any "real" belly dance ought to be) and explained what I do. This should have been my heads-up. But, I guess I was hoping it would all be OK.

I was so wrong.

My performance at that event lasted exactly 6 minutes. It was certainly not the shortest performance I have ever done, but less than half of what I would usually do, at such an event. I would have completed my routine, would have preferred to complete my routine, but it was obvious that the stiff shirts standing around me had gotten to just about all they could take of me after the first three minutes. Besides the "OK, we are done with you now, this IS the end of your show now, right?" hand clapping, it was the glazed look of horror in their eyes (it looked as if they were expecting me to, at any minute, rip my panties off and masturbate in front of them) that stopped me.

It was almost as bad as the gig I had nine months ago, where the wife of the birthday boy, upon seeing me in full belly dance regalia, jumped up sobbing "Oh no! No! I don't want this! I am NOT HAPPY!" before running into the kitchen and bursting into tears for the rest of my performance.

Does anyone have any idea how difficult it is to perform for people who clearly do not want me to perform for them?

My question is this; How can you, when considering hiring me, not know your family and friends enough to know whether or not they can tolerate a belly dance? What were you thinking?