I am participating in on-line dating. I think my ad is relatively "normal". "Single gal, looking for single guy, likes long walks, movies, and fine dining," etc etc. So my question is; Why do I inevitably get pictures of men's penises? What is this need to publicly post pictures of their phallus's? Are they afraid that I may not find their character intriguing enough without the promotion of their private parts? Are they showing off? Making sure I like their member as much as I may like them? Concerned that I may judge them as inadequate without a long hard look at their long hard...
In spite of my experiences and smarts, I always seem to get caught off guard. Speechless, when confronted by the profile of the one-eyed monster staring back at me on the screen.
A while ago, I had been chatting with what I had thought was a relatively normal male having a relatively normal initial chatter when he asked me if it was OK if he sent me a "sexy" picture of himself. I said "sure!" Thinking I would be getting a picture of the man perhaps shirtless, showing off his muscles, or on the beach with a big smile and a tan. He told me that his ex-girlfriend was in the picture, apologized for that ahead of time, and assured me that he had her consent to post this picture for me to see. I DID think it was kind of odd, why post a picture of you with your ex, while in pursuit of someone new? And what kind of a person gives permission to do this? But whatever. Who am I to judge. And wouldn't another picture of this person of interest only be aiding my determination of whether or not to date him?
OMG!!!
Well, the guy kind of WAS in the picture, but not enough to say that the picture was of him. As soon as I clicked on the link, I could immediately see this was not just a "sexy"picture of a guy in grape smugglers. In fact, he wasn't wearing anything at all except for his GFs face hanging off the end of his...well...thingamajig. Now there is no way anyone could identify the man in this picture as all that one could see of him was a bit of his belly and just part of his, uh, "part" (at least, the part of his part that wasn't in his GF's MOUTH). BUT I could certainly identify his GFs face from across a crowded smokey room. WTF???
Needless to say, I can never ever seriously consider this guy as a possibly candidate because there is no way I can ever ever even think of him without seeing this photo in my minds' eye. OMG OMG OMG!!!
Was this supposed to impress me? HOW??? I carefully combed through my ad to see if there was anything that could have been misconstrued as me being a swinger, or bi, or a BJ fanatic. Nope, nothing. Am I being a prude? Judgemental? Unaccepting of how others chose to express themselves? Missing a chapter in my Dating for Dummies book?
Well, I have gotten unsolicited penis pictures from pursuers before, but for me, this takes the cake.
I don't think it's a question of you being "judgmental" or "prudish." I think it's a question of him being an objectfying dolt.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, people. Would you make your first introduction to a woman you met at a bar an introduction to your dick, unzipped and exposed under the table? No. It's NOT APPROPRIATE to assume that level of intimacy with a stranger, for frak's sake. By zeroing in on his willy, he's signalling clearly that it's all about...his willy. Not you, not who you are, not who he is, not how you'll get along and oh, maybe at a mutually acceptable time, HAVE SEX. It's All About His Dick.
I also have a related observation about men who brag about their penis size. Bragging about your dick is like bragging about the size of your patriotism. If you gotta brag abut how big and strong it is, it ain't.